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Advice needed!!
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I need advice before I throw my fiance out of my house for good.  I believe he has sleep apnea that developed almost 2 years ago.  He has the typical tossing, turning, jumping around, loud snoring.  Wakes up with a bad headach and feels terrible all the time, has developed high BP adn Chol. and has been gaining weight.  He also sleeps all day and even has dosed off while driving.  His memory is completely shot!!  It took almsot 2 years of arguing to get him to finally go to the doctor and his sleep test is Wednesday.  I'm not sure if that is going to come soon enough for me.  He is constantly in a bad mood, extremely negative about everything, and belittles me and snaps at me constantly-only to conveniently "forget" what he said and I just made it up b/c he would NEVER say things like that to me....  He finally hit the last nerve with me this weekend with his attitude and new found selfishness.  He has ruined 2 of my birthdays, christmas, our aniversary, and wedding planning by being such a #(#&@^@ and/or sleeping the whole time!!!!!  He acts like he doesn't care and makes no sense when he argues with me.  I told him I have NO idea who this person in front of me is anymore and I want the guy I used to know back-or he can pack up and be someone elses pain in the a$$.  I feel like I am raising a 3 year old!!!! All he says is that "The doctors can't cure me so you just need to deal-there is no magic pill this is me!".  Will they be able to get rid of this horrible person that has overtaken my once happy go lucky loving fiance?  I honestly can't take anymore!


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Let me share with you one anecdote from my earlier days on CPAP, and you decide if it will help (I say it will make a BIG difference)

       My daughter, then 5, came in the house with a new neighbor friend. As they walked by my bedroom, I heard the neighbor girl ask/exclaim, "Ooooh! What's that thing?!" (Referring to my headgear hanging on the headboard of our bed.)
"That's daddy's sleepin' machine.", my daughter replied, "He's not grumpy no more!"

     You decide. If a 5 year old can tell the difference at one months' duration, will it make a difference? You bet it will.

All of the signs/symptoms that you have described are CLASSIC SIGNS of sleep apnea, no matter which form the apneas are in. My signature box sums it up very well.

So, if he won't get it tested, and treated, then you may have to boot him out, and too many times it has taken that drastic of measure to get the wake-up call into them, whether it be OSA, Alcoholism, or something else. But, if he does go, and does try,you make sure that you are supportive of him, and give it time, it won't happen overnight.

  I do have to disagree with one commentyou made, though. After havinggone through it myself, you are not dealing with a three year old... it's more like two! Don't fight with him, don't argue with him. Keep loving and encouraging him, and soon you'll overcome this condition.  Hang in there. You're not alone in this, even if it seems like it!


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Sleep Apnea is a Killer! Get it Tested!
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